Covid Baby!

We get out of the car and my anxiety is sky high. Gila had been going back and forth over shabbat if we should get to the hospital, but we waited and called on our past experiences to guide us. 

Very empowering moment.

I'll get back to past experiences in a bit. 

Pregnancy comes with so much uncertainty, much like parenting, although I think if pregnancy went on for any longer than 40 weeks no woman in their right mind would ever do it. It's like rehab for control freaks. Some people go waaay over the top with other aspects of their lives due to the lack of 'being in control' during pregnancy. 

Hubby's tip: Ice-cream solves 99% of problems. 

In hindsight it really was the perfect time to get to the hospital. Granted it was midnight, but how many new- borns do you know that can tell time. Lots of parking, no lines, all at the small price of no sleep. Ahh sleep. Don't see us getting back to THAT any time soon. 

Almost 9 months of a relatively uneventful (BH) pregnancy, which may or may not have included some late night drives for ice cream. Cliché I know. With my wife in labor I wasn't about to let the 'anxious' win.

Then BAM, your thoughts suddenly turn to - will Gila have to give birth in quarantine? Will I be in quarantine alone for the birth? For the past 10 days I'm the only one who has left the house. If Gila or the kids show symptoms, chances are it's because of me. 

And on and on. 

Calmer and boring books have been written, but the experience we have had as a individuals, married couple and family over the past 6 weeks has been nothing short of extraordinary. There are multiple expletives I could use but 

I've been trying to find the words to express the feelings, both ups and downs, smiles and cries... well... you get the idea. I want to share them. 

What no book, blog or expert can ever teach you is the infinite patience it takes to successfully navigate through parenting. Most likely the reason why no one does, and we're all saving up for countless hours of therapy for our kids. 

We literally are. 

Many have tried to guide parents with their words of wisdom, but no book could advise through something like this, levels of chaos and uncertainty way above our past experiences. 

I would almost absolutely lose my mind from the moment I parked until I found that first bottle of Septol to douse my hands. Leaving the hospital you stink eye all the patients and others who come across your path. The voices in your head screaming - You pushed the elevator button with your finger?! Don't you know there's a pandemic?! What is wrong with you??!! 

And then you take a breath, look down at this miracle of joy and blessings. This little symbol of life, hope and a future full of light. There's nothing quite like a new born baby to rip out all that apprehension and recalibrate to appreciation. 

This is our journey through the birth of our 4th child who was born כו אדר, March 22nd when the world was, and still is, holding its breath. The unknown and uncertainty has actually made us stronger.